60 Days

Today is two months until I can file for US citizenship. I'm looking forward to it and dreading it at the same time. This, hopefully, will be my final interaction with the great bureaucracy that is the USCIS (formerly INS) and I hope it goes smoothly. Their capacity for screwing things up so badly that people find themselves mewling for peace and mercy is legendary. I'd prefer to not experience that if possible. I'd really hate having to abandon my home and return to what is a foreign country to me because of some type of paperwork snafu.

But when it is all said and done, I can breathe a sigh of relief and never have to deal with them again.

60 days to go.

Rock Star

If anyone reading this had the opportunity to go to Wolf Trap in Northern Virginia on Saturday night, I was there. You probably wouldn't have recognized me since I was in uniform:

I'm the TIE Pilot on the right. My friend Tom is the Stormtrooper. The Imperial Gunner is a fellow we met at the troop.

I was attending the concert there with the 501st Legion for A Night with John Williams with Erich Kunzel conducting the National Symphony Orchestra. All I can say about the event was it was incredible!

This was my first "troop" with the 501st Legion. The 501st is an all-volunteer group of costumers dedicated to the Star Wars universe. Fans one and all, anyone can join. The only requirement is you have an appropriate "screen ready" costume of an Imperial character or alien from the Star Wars universe. For most people, this will be the most recognizable and iconic symbol of the Empire in Star Wars: The Imperial Stormtrooper.

The 501st is highly regarded within communities for providing event "color" and support to a variety of charity events. Especially children's charities. If a group would like to attract some attention and get help to raise money that makes kids (and adults) smile, they can request an appearance by the 501st. Members local to the event will then show up in costume, make the rounds, pose for pictures, maintain order, show the public face of the Empire and generally have a good time.

People may think this is crazy. But who cares? If you've never attended an event like this, you won't understand until you do. Children, small and teen and adults both young and old just love this stuff. After the double-takes the first time you spot a Stormtrooper walking around or you see Darth Vader sweeping the through the crowd, the expressions turn to wide grins, amused head shakes and lots of children running to get their pictures taken.

You literally are surrounded and swamped. Everyone who has a camera or anything with a camera in it get them out to take pictures. People rush in to get their pictures taken with you. Some just want to be between the Imperials. Others want to be "under arrest". Kids rush forward on their own or at the encouragement of their parents. "You want to get your picture taken with the Stormtrooper?" you hear and the kids run forward with glee and squeals.

You give high fives to the kids small and large. They love holding the prop blasters and being part of the group. Alas, a few kids are terrified and cry when you get close. I feel bad at those moments. But from their perspective, we're six foot tall white and black monsters. You still wave to them and move on.

Adults get into the game as well. This kind of thing transcends age and gender. You'll get everyone from giggling teenage girls to older men and women with snow white hair, average folks, middle class professionals, people in formal wear and everyone in between. Husbands will encourage wives. Wives toss in their husbands. Both will come up together and hand someone else their camera. It's huge fun all the way around.

For this event, the local 501st garrison, Garrison Tyranus was there at the invitation of Maestro Erich Kunzel who was conducting the symphony that night. The 501st had been present at a previous concert he had put on at the Kennedy Center in 2007 and he asked for us to return. Something the local garrison Commanding Officer was more than happy to do. Several other garrison members, including some members from as far away as Ohio, drove in to attend as well.

We had the opportunity to go out for the morning rehearsal to co-ordinate the evening activities. I managed to attend the rehearsal so I would know what was going on and be able to tell others later. The rehearsal meetings went very well and the Wolf Trap staff was thrilled to guide the garrison co-ordinators around. Folks like me were along for the ride and taking it all in. The highlight of the morning was meeting the maestro himself and hearing what he would like to do. Erich Kunzel is a big fan of Star Wars and made suggestions beyond the original plans which were happily accepted. He is a very friendly and down-to-earth guy and his suggestions were things the crowd that evening would love.

A bonus was getting to hear the concert in advance. Even in practice the National Symphony Orchestra sounded amazing.

The event was divided into two parts: greeting the public and stage appearances. Greeting the public was first and was nearly aborted due to a thunderstorm rolling through shortly after the gates opened. Fortunately it passed quickly and the pride of the Empire marched up the stairs to patrol the mobs of gathered Imperial citizenry. They welcomed the presence of the Emperor's finest. I was in a group of three with a "squire" attending to the crowd so everyone could get their picture taken who wanted to.

This is very important since anyone with a helmet on has a hard time seeing. For example, we can't look down. Squires are useful to help guide us and prevent us from missing someone or running over a small child we can't see.

All I can say is the crowd loved it. It was a totally different experience being in the costume (having been a squire on previous troops) and was so worth it. One reason is the psychological impact of being in a helmet. The anonymity of being just another Imperial tends to relax you and let you get into character in a way having your face visible may not. People who are shy in person get into character and loosen up in costume. I guess it is because no one can see your face so no one can judge you. You're literally a mask. For me, I was grinning the entire time under my helmet.

We worked the crowd for what seemed like fifteen minutes but was actually over an hour. Time flies so fast you don't realize it. Then the warning bells for the start of the show began chiming and we were called back to the backstage for the real show to begin.

At the conductor's request, we had four appearances on the stage. One of these was a lightsaber duel between two Jedis that when through the entire seating pavillion. The other three appearances were with the costumed Imperials on-stage during various musical numbers. It was arranged so that everyone would have two appearances on stage.

The first was the Flag Parade theme from Episode I. 15 of us, myself included, marched across the stage. Just follow the trooper in front of you. The mask also helps with stage fright. Fortunately, I'm comfortable in front of people (thanks to public speeches in school) but others I'm sure were nervous. But it was huge fun and the audience reaction was delighted.

The second and third appearances were the Jedi and the Imperial March. The Imperial March is Darth Vader's theme and for this, Stormtroopers marched onto the stage followed by Darth Vader. The crowd burst into applause at his appearance as he inspected the troops. The highlight of this piece was Darth Vader dueling with maestro Erich Kunzel (at his request), lightsaber versus conductor's baton. The crowd loved it. Apparently the baton was mightier than the lightsbaer since Erich waved the pesky Vader away and had his troops march off the stage.

The final appearance was during the encore. No Star Wars music presentation is complete without the theme from the Mos Eisley Cantina. Here, all of 34 of us in costume walked on to the stage and for the entire song twisted and shook in our armor. I had it easier than most since my uniform is soft from the waist down. Mobility is not the strong suit of a Stormtrooper. I will not describe what I did up there since I can't dance but I did have fun. Fortunately, we had no "armor malfunctions" (to my knowledge) and audience gave a raptuous applause. A few bows and waves and the night was over for us.

At the intermission, the 501st presented Maestro Erich Kunzel with "Friend of the Legion" and "Honorary Member" awards for his support of Star Wars and the 501st. The presentation was made with every member present, helmets on and lining the walls as honor guard. He was thrilled. Great job on the 501st officers for putting that together! Arguably the most moving and memorable moment for us and something the audience never saw. These things are what make the 501st and being a member of it so special.

The Wolf Trap staff were very professional and treated all of us like rock stars. We were very welcome and many of the staff and even symnphony members had their pictures taken with us backstage and afterwards. Even after the concert as we were getting out of costume, requests were still coming in for pictures.

I have never had rock star treatment before. Just being there was a privilege and something I'm going to remember for a long time. If you're going to have a memorable first troop, it will be very difficult to top this. I don't even think "Air and Scare" later this year will be quite the same.

It is no cost to join the 501st. Just your time and the expense involved in getting a "screen ready" costume made and approved for membership. Costume options are personal choice and a wide variety are available. Join the Imperial Navy and see the Galaxy! Or enforce the Emperor's Will as one of his finest Stormtroopers. Keep the spacelines safe from Rebel attack as an elite TIE Fighter Pilot. And on and on. There is a place in the Empire for you!

For the Empire!

Illegal Immigration in Perspective

Found this on the Maryland Shooters forum. Don't know the source or when it was written but this helps put the illegal immigration issue into perspective for those who think iit s nuanced and complicated.

Let's say I break into your house

A lady wrote the best letter in the Editorials in ages!!! It explains things better than all
the baloney you hear on TV.

Her point:

Recently large demonstrations have taken place across the country protesting the fact that Congress is finally addressing the issue of illegal immigration.

Certain people are angry that the US might protect its own borders, might make it harder
to sneak into this country and, once here, to stay indefinitely.

Let me see if I correctly understand the thinking behind these protests. Let's say I break into your house.

Let's say that when you discover me in your house, you insist that I leave.


But I say, 'No! I like it here. It's better than my house. I've made all the beds and washed the
dishes and did the laundry and swept the floors. I've done all the things you don't like to do. I'm hard-working and honest (except for when I broke into your house).

According to the protesters:

You are Required to let me stay in your house
You are Required to feed me
You are Required to add me to your family's insurance plan
You are Required to Educate my kids
You are Required to Provide other benefits to me & to my family
My husband will do all of your yard work because he is also hard-working and honest. (except for that breaking in part).

If you try to call the police or force me out, I will call my friends who will picket your house carrying signs that proclaim my RIGHT to be there.

It's only fair, after all, because you have a nicer house than I do, and I'm just trying to better myself. I'm a hard-working and honest, person, except for well, you know, I did break into your house And what a deal it is for me!!!

I live in your house, contributing only a fraction of the cost of my keep, and there is nothing you can do about it without being accused of cold, uncaring, selfish, prejudiced, and bigoted behavior.

Oh yeah, and I DEMAND that you learn MY LANGUAGE!!! so that you can communicate with me.

Why can't people see how ridiculous this is?! America is populated and governed by idiots.
If you agree, pass it on (in English).

If not blow it off......... along with your future Social Security funds and a lot of the former benefits of being an American Citizen.

Dreams

Dreams. We all have them. Each person has a list of things they want to accomplish in their lives. As always, this list varies greatly from person to person and sometimes those dreams are not achievable or realistic. Or, at least, realistic to one and not to another.

I consider myself very fortunate to have accomplished several so far a third of the way or so through my life. My mother is to blame for some of that. She encouraged my sister and I to strive for me and achieve more than she did. In that she succeeded. The result of that encouragement for me was the development of a somewhat impulsive yet deep desire to experience life as broadly and completely as possible.

I've done more than I ever thought I would. Most people throughout their lives barely live more than 50 miles from where they are born. Many will never travel away from home distances greater than that. Note I am speaking of people worldwide. In our Western civilization many of us will travel distances greater than this as a matter of routine. To us, it is mundane. Just daily life. For billions around the world this would be considered exceptional.

I do not take that for granted.

Most people do not pick up their lives and lay down roots 1200 miles and another country away. Few are fortunate enough to have skills that mesh well with a job they love and not become burned out by it. For many people, a job is a job. Most don't have a passion for their work. I do.

My mother, like all parents, only wished for us to be happy at what we did. For her, that was a definition of success. Not how much money you made. The fact that I make a good living at something I enjoy is a definite bonus. That has enabled me to accomplish and do things I never thought possible. Gun ownership, sailing, the ability to indulge more or less freely in hobbies that interest me are some of those things.

As a result, I am able to consider things with seriousness that weren't even dreams a decade ago.

I've acquired firearms that I never thought I'd own. Four odd years ago, the idea of even owning firearms was a foreign concept.

I've been to foreign countries, seen and done things I only read about in books or seen on TV. A Caribbean cruise may not seem like a big deal but to someone who had only been out of country once in their life prior to moving to the USA, that was something rich people did. Diving, sailing, walking in the footsteps of ancients who came before me. These are things most of my family prior to my generation that anyone it had never done.

And I still have more to do. I want to share a dream with you. To many, this will seem positively insane.

This is one of my dreams...


Most of you are looking at this going "Ok, a sailboat. So what?".

This sailboat is called a Mini 6.5. 6.5 for its length of 6.5 meters or around 21.3 feet. It's not a big boat. In fact, length-wise it is shorter than my recently acquired O'Day 22. But this little boat is not a pleasure sailer.

It's an ocean racer. Not only that, it is a single handed ocean racer.

The Mini 6.5 is the smallest boat used in a race called the Mini-Transat. "Transat" stands for "Trans-Atlantic". Every two years, fleets of approximately 70 of these boats gather in France and sail in a 4000 mile ocean race. On each boat is a single individual. For these 4000 ocean miles, one man or woman would sail solo testing themselves mentally and physically against each other and Nature in a boat not much larger than a car.

The number of people who do this is not much larger than the total number of people who have flown in space. It's a small club.

One of my dreams is to do a Mini-Transat.

That is a long term goal because it requires the completition of several steps. One of which involves in either borrowing or buying a Mini 6.5. This is actually the easiest part since, relatively speaking, a Mini 6.5 is a cheap racing boat. A Mini 6.5 ready to sail away costs between $38,000 and $55,000 US new from the factory.

While I wait for the gales of laughter to subside, those who know sailing will realize that's actually not bad for a boat in this class. Price out a used J105 sometime. Pitched as an entry-level, weekend and occasional ocean club racer for the casual sailor, these 35 foot one-design boats start around $95,000 and head well into the $130,000 range for newer boats.

As I said, relatively cheap. When everything involving sailing are multiples of $100 and $1000, forty or fifty grand for a race boat new from the factory is considered a bargain. That low cost is one of the goals that were set out for the Mini 6.5 class in the first place. They were designed to be economical to own and race.

Contrast that to the pinnacle of single-handed racing: the Vendee Globe. The Mini-Transat is often used as the training ground for would-be Vendee Globe racers. The Vendee Globe is a single-handed, non-stop, around-the-world race via circumnavigation of Antarctica. The number of men and women who have completed a Vendee Globe race make the Mini-Transat club seem very crowded by comparison. Mini 6.5s share many of the same features as the large Open 60s (note the similarities between an Open 60 and Mini 6.5 in shape and layout) used in the Vendee Globe.

A Vendee Globe campaign can and does cost millions to get into. A shoestring campaign would easily run north of $500,000. It is not possible for a single individual to race a Vendee Globe or similar event in an Open 60 on their own dime unless they are Larry Ellison. It is very possible for a dedicated middle class individual to fund a Mini 6.5 campaign privately and many do.

It takes a special kind of person to attempt a Vendee Globe. I don't think I have the stones for what is involved in that race. But I do think I have the necessary courage, spirit of adventure and determination to see out a Mini-Transat. Even if only once.

Which is really what it is about. To lock oneself into a moving paint stirrer, complete with liquid sloshing around, cold, wet and alone. But to arrive in one piece at the end of it and tell folks years later are the things that stay with you long after it is done. Over a century later after Joshua Slocum first sailed solo around the world, the desire of others to do the same stills burns strong. Most recently, a 17 year old from North Carolina did just that.

Once in my life, I want to just leave the world behind and test myself. See if I have what it takes. It wouldn't take long in terms of the racing. A couple months or so. Cost-wise it isn't that expensive if I start saving now and make a run for a Transat in 2015. It wouldn't even be to win. Just to qualify and finish. Then put the picture of me on my boat on my desk at work and return to a normal life. How many questions or awestruck looks would you get in telling that story to your co-workers?

That is the stuff dreams are made of.

Come Yourself

Gun rights advocates often find themselves in an endless circle of discussion and argument on the same topics. It's cyclical. The reason for this is it seems the same tired arguments in favor of gun control tend to be circulated in the same manner. For a few months we'll hear about "assault weapons". Then the evils of concealed carry. Then the evils of allowing concealed carry where it previously wasn't permitted and how "blood will flow in the streets". Or "cop killer" bullets. Or the gaping abyssal chasm of the "gun show loophole".

And on and on and on.

The problem with this after a while it becomes really hard to argue or debunk the same points time and time again. Like anyone, you get tired of repetitive behavior. Past a certain point you just don't want to type out the same argument that you made six months ago on the same issue but in a slightly different way.

Gun control is not rational. Because it isn't, any arguments we make against are not for the benefit of the one arguing for gun control but for the passers-by that happen to wander within earshot or blogshot. Those are the minds we are after. Gun control supporters are frankly a bunch of scared, whiny sissies well along in the process of devolution to lower life forms. Inverterbrates, specifically, since it is clear most gun control supporters lost their spines a quite some time ago.

With a gulf that wide between our species there is no hope of reconcilliation. So why bother?

Because it's fun.

Now, I know that is a cruel thing to toy with someone's fragile emotions in that way. To some, it is sick and twisted to derive pleasure by deliberately inflicting emotional harm on others. But since they are acting on emotion I can count on them to plug their ears and run away screaming "La! La! La!" within a few minutes, I figure they've brought it on themselves. Or they get pissed and call me "heartless", "souless" or "bloodthirsty". Haven't been called a racist yet but I'm sure it is coming. But since they've chosen to inject themselves into adult issues and adult conversation, it isn't my fault if their poor little ego is bruised and they have to run home to Mommy screaming like they've skinned their knee after falling off their bike with the training wheels still on.

These are times where random stuff pops into your head. Because the gun controller often likes to head for the edge cases and absurd of "What If?", your mind often decides to do so as well.

The reason for this is my perennial favorite haunt of the bigot, the intolerant, the screaming ninny and the perpetual busybody: Democratic Underground. Yes, I daily wander into the Guns forum there and read the latest and greatest against gun rights and the cheer on, in my mind since I've been banned multiple times and have run out of e-mail addresses to sacrifice on that altar, those who defend them. I would point out that this is a separate forum on DU in order to keep the general populace of the place from learning about the issue.

The moment any gun related topic appears in General Discussion, especially if it asks an opinion on gun rights or is in support of them, it is immediately banished to the "Gungeon" as it is called. Without exception, a guns oriented post lasts maybe a day at most before it is shuffled out of sight like a disfigured child locked in the attic where it can't offend the guests by its horrible visage.

Yep, tolerance and support for dissenting viewpoints abounds there alright.

Spend anytime reading through this morass and certain themes emerge and repeat. It's almost a form of bigot "Game of Life" where various patterns arise, survive and sustain themselves and fade away as new ones evolve to replace them.

One of these patterns is the often stated desire for gun licensing and/or registration. Two reasons are given for this desire.

The first seems logical and rational based on day-to-day life: we license and register cars. If we do it for cars, why don't we do it for dangerous weapons? The most obvious answer and is always ignored by the ones proposing this is simple: we don't license rights. I fall into that school of thought although I personally subscribe to LawDog's views on the subject.

If the anti-rights bigots were actually sincere on the notion of "licensing guns the way we license cars", I'd be all over it, LawDog style. I have yet to see an anti-rights person rise to LawDog's assertions which only goes to prove their real intentions behind the proposal.

But what I am really on about is the second reason. The other argument made in favor of registration/licensing is one of crime control. Specificially that with gun registration we'll be able to catch criminals who use guns in crime.

Blink, blink?!? You want to run that one by me again, Mr. Resaonable Gun Control?

What shocks me is hardly anyone on that pillar of intellectual supremacy points out the logical disconnect in that assertion. It's the DU version of the "Underpants Gnomes":

• Step 1: Register all guns
• Step 2: ?
• Step 3: Catch criminals!

No one bothers to explain how we get to Step 3 after Step 1. Tam did it best in pointing out this disconnect with a quote attributed to Marko in this post:

When someone asks you about licensing and registration, pick up a pen and a sheet of paper. Tear the paper in half and hand half to your questioner. Say "Okay, this pen is a gun. The paper I'm holding is my license and the paper you're holding is the registration. Using only these two pieces of paper, explain to me just how you are going to keep me from shooting someone?". After the initial red-faced sputtering, the responses are invariably hilarious.

Using the same analogy, let's modify it slighty:

"Okay, this pen is a gun. The paper I'm holding is my gun license and the paper you're holding is the gun registration stored with law enforcement. A criminal wanders by and steals my gun. Now, using only these two pieces of paper, explain to me how they are going to lead me to the criminal?"

I hope Marko doesn't mind me running with this a little bit.

Gun controllers don't get this. They never respond to the first criticism of such a scheme which is the fact that criminals don't register their guns! How on Earth would a law compelling mandatory registration of all firearms also cause compliance on the part of a class of individuals provably known for not obeying laws in the first place? Appeal to their better natures and sense of community? All they can offer up is emotional platitudes that they will "feel safer" knowing that the Government (ironically whom they don't trust on other issues) knows where all these guns are.

The mind boggles. But hey, at least they're being somewhat honest when they state this. Most, however, do not or simply argue from authority.

At best, all gun registration does it lead to the last legal owner, nothing more. Unless the legal owner decided to cross the line from law-abiding citizen to criminal and conveniently leave their registered gun at the scene of the crime. Then, and only then, would registration catches criminals.

I can tell you how often that happens: Pretty much never. If you doubt this, give the comments here a read about Canada's much vaunted gun registry. Most echo the absurdity of the notion that registration leads to catching criminals. Remember, Canada's system of gun licensing and registration is held up as a model worthy of emulation here in the United States. The irony is the above article for advocating for the efficacy of Canada's gun registry is from an American organization.

Anecdotally, I've read (and cannot find the source) that the Canadian gun registry has yet to solve a single actual crime involving a legally owned firearm in the database. After billions of dollars and years of service with still no end in sight. If true, it merely proves Marko's assertion. Dave Kopel echoes this here.

Supporters of the registry argue that the overrun was not that bad for such a good program. Unfortunately for anybody taking this tack, there are no actual successes to tout. Not one crime has been solved by the registry. Allan Rock claims that the registry has saved 1,240 lives a year, but nonpartisan Canadian criminologists such as Philip Stenning and Matthew Yeager scoff at this assertion. (Stenning teaches at the University of Toronto's Centre of Criminology. Yeager is a consulting criminologist who once served as staff researcher for the U.S. Conference of Mayors' campaign to promote gun control.) Firearms suicide has declined, but has been replaced by other methods.

Emphasis mine.

There is another reason gun registration is opposed and this is the one that envokes the cookie cutter response from the anti-rights bigots on DU when registration is resisted by gun owners there. It is the meme they accuse the gun owners of when they resist registration by saying gun owners believe Democrats "are going to take their guns" and ask gun owners to point out where that has happened in this country since they view this as absurd and extremist. And then promptly ignore examples of California (SKS), New York City ("assault weapons") or New Orleans (by police fiat) as isolated examples and that a co-ordinated attempt at confiscation using the registration lists as a guide "would never happen here".

And also set aside historical examples from around the world in 20th Century. Disarmament has almost always occurred after registration historically speaking. Just because it hasn't happened yet in places like Canada doesn't mean it can't. Britain and Australia ought to serve as loud and clear warnings that it can and does happen. Often rapidly.

These are the reasons why registration is resisted hotly by gun owners. One, we know and acknowledge the logical disconnect between registration and solving gun crime and how registration cannot aid in crime control. It is nothing more than "gun owner control" used to marginalize and isolate gun owners an aberrant members of society. Subject to further controls at their whim "for the good of society".

Two, given the long history of registration leading to confiscation which can be factually shown to have occurred here and abroad, it will be resisted no matter what other justifications "for the common good" are offered. Decades of gun control in this country have shown that the other side simply cannot be trusted on the subject.

Not to continue enforcing blunt trauma on a deceased equus but that leads me to the point of this post and the random thing that popped into my mind on the topic. It is an answer to the "What If?" question if it actually happened here.

Let's assume gun registration happens here. Let's assume that some unknown number of tragedies that are exploited for political gain occur and those in power now decide to request turn in on penalty of forcible confiscation some number of "bad" firearms. Handguns, "assault weapons", large caliber shotguns, plane downing .50s and so on.

I think it would be perfectly reasonable under such circumstances that a significant number of otherwise law-abiding gun owners would engage in mass civil disobedience as exercised by Canadian gun owners today and simply refuse to comply. Some will have refused the prior voluntary registration but I find this a weak argument. Aside from taking a principled stand which I admire, a government willing to change the law so radically to create national registration would have no issues as part of that new law to use the decades worth of available Form 4473s as the starting point of their database. Even if you didn't give them your gun information, they've probably got it in one form another. Certainly not all of your guns but a good start.

If national registration happens, it is going to happen. Gun owners will certainly resist peaceably, to be sure, but at the end of the day the Government will have a list containing some significant percentage of the guns in this country. This is about what happens next when history decides to darken our doorstep with a repeat visit.

Anti-rights bigots, slaves to their hatred of views foreign to their own and who decry guns as "uncivilized", have no problem stating stonily that they have no problem with the armed agents of the Government coming to your home and disarming you by force. Certain classes aren't entitled to firearms and force is allowed in their worldview to deprive those classes (you) of their property. Because it is their views in power they don't see the issue in this. Hopefully you can recognize the irony in that viewpoint that guns in one set of hands, theirs, must be used to take them out of another set, yours, because they are the ones in control. Or living in fear.

This is tyranny plain and simple. So I wish to echo my thought on what I would like to see happen should this ever come to pass.

"You want to disarm me. Fine, that you can do under the power you've voted yourselves. I do not have to acknowledge it. And will not. However, I will be willing to give it some small token of legitimacy if you pass a consfication law as follows...".

I, as a sovereign individual within this society, grant you the authority to pass a confiscation law under the following terms:

One, you may not send armed agents of any state or federal entity to enforce it. This includes the military. Since such an act violates the Constitution and in my fantasy, I get to believe the vast majority of law enforcement and military members will take their Oaths seriously. In addition, no armed agents may be used to enforce other decrees against private citizens suspected of non-compliance for any other suspected crimes. As long as they are wanted for their disobedience that is all you can go after them for for the duration.

Two, given that you may not send agents of the state to enforce your decree, I grant you the power to do so yourself. For every legislator that votes "Yes" on such a bill, I grant you the authority to come in person to my home to enforce your decree with whatever private citizen who is not a member of any of the previously mentioned enforcement groups who wishes to accompany you. If you can convince the Attorney General, absent bodyguards and police, your next-door neighbor and so one to come along, knock yourself out. However, the gun owner you are targeting has the same authority and are free to invite as many friends to their side as they can muster.

Three, your group shall be held immune from prosecution for murder and any other mayhem you cause. Likewise so shall the gun owner and any individuals allied with him/her. A bounty of $100,000 shall be placed per head of the enforcing legislator or the gun owner only. Only the group who is allied with the successful party may claim the bounty. No bounties may be claimed for the accompanying parties unless they themselves are wanted or legitimate. Example: Senator Joe Dickhead brings his posse to a home of a known resisting gun owner and the gun owner happens to have four other friends on the same list with him/her. If Senator Dickhead manages to capture or kill all five wanted individuals, he or his party could claim a bounty of $500,000. If the wanted individuals capture or kill him, the most they could claim is $100,000.

Four, you may use any weapons that are deemed presently legal and held legally at the time of enactment. This means you cannot use weapons or equipment limited to government, law enforcement or military purposes. If you can obtain the necessary tax stamps and paperwork for items that fall under the NFA from the BATFE, feel free to expend them. You want to pay a $200 tax per cannon shell, wait months for approval to use them and comply with all the storage regulations, go right ahead. This applies to both sides. However, the use of any such weapons must limit their damage to the property of the wanted gun owner. No more and no less. Collateral damage is not permitted.

Five, legislators attempting to enforce this decree may only do so from funds available to them privately. No public monies, services or equipment may be used. If you need the address of an individual, you must locate them using services and options available to the general public. Don't know where a gun owner lives? Hire a private investigator. Government databases and records available only to the government are strictly off-limits.

And lastly...

Six, should you capture a non-compliant gun owner alive, you must try them in a court of law and imprison them for violations of the turn-in order only. This will be a misdemeanor crime and limited to 6 months in jail and a fine. However, should the gun owner capture you alive, they are free to execute you for treason in a public setting at a time and place of their choosing. By voting "Yes" on such a law you did violate your Oath to uphold and defend the Constitution and thus have forfeited its protections.

Somehow, I don't think the anti-rights bigots will get behind this. But in my fantasy this is the way such a law should be. No force of the State, no control of the People through bureaucrats and unelected actors. Just you. If you believe strongly enough in the cause of citizen disarmament, you should have no difficulty finding enough people to get in line behind (or in front) of you and come and do it yourself and take your chances.

Otherwise, do not lie about gun registration being about crime control. Just tell the truth and say you want power over those unlike you and you will use the power of the State to enforce your will.

At least then you'd be honest about what gun registration is really about.

I now return you to Reality.

July 20, 1969

Bolt wins today on best reporting of how it happened on today, the 40th anniversary of man setting foot on the moon.

An American, I might add. That makes me proud that even 40 years later, that feat is one that known worldwide as a uniquely American one and totally unparalleled by anyone else then or since.

Can you imagine the school lessons today and the retrospectives if generations had to watch and were brought up on if the first words uttered by the first human on the moon were "Holy Living Fuck!".

Part of me has to wonder if any of the men who walked on the moon thought that once or twice while they were there. I sure as hell know I would.

The other alternative history that I would pay good money for time on a time machine on to produce and has probably occurred in a parallel universe came from the HBO series "From the Earth to the Moon". Which I am listening to on my iPod today, by the way, in celebration of the occasion.

In the movie about the Apollo 11 moon landing there is a scene with Michael Collins, Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin before the mission talking about what the first words will be. During this conversation, Collins quips "If you had any balls you'd yell 'Oh my God what is that thing!?!', scream and cut your mike.".

Somehow, I don't think the mission controllers and the public-at-large back home would be appreciative of that lunar standup comedy. But boy would it make for interesting history lessons for generations to come!

Even today and for those like me who were born afterwards, I still find this event profound and moving. The sad part is we haven't repeated it.

I be will cheering and my heart pounding when we hopefully do it again in the next decade or so.

And just to show how awesome this achievement is, check this out.

These are images from the Lunar Reconnaissance Orbiter of the actual Apollo landing sites! Take special notice of the Apollo 14 site (Alan Shephard, Ed Mitchell). You can see the tracks of their travels on the surface! Take that, hoaxers!

"We came in peace for all Mankind.". Indeed.

Reasonable and Sensible: Sad Panda Edition

Breaking News! From the Washington Times:

Legal guns in D.C. not used one year later
No report of one being fired, stolen, used in crime

In other news: Water is still wet.

From the article:

Today, Amy McVey's handgun is one of just 515 that have been legally registered with the Metropolitan Police Department -- a number that pales compared with more than 2,000 illegal weapons that have been seized in the same period.

She hasn't had to use it to defend her home. Nor has anyone attempted to steal it and use it against her or to commit some other crime -- undermining the most widely used arguments for and against permitting guns.

In fact, police say they have no information that would indicate any gun legally registered since July 17, 2008, has been fired by its owner in defense of life or property, or that one has been stolen or used in the commission of a crime.

Not. One. Stolen.

Not. One. Shooting.

Not. One. Crime

Which confirms what any thinking human with a functioning brain stem knew all along would be the likely outcome of DC's unconstitutional ban on handgun possession being stuck down. Law-abiding citizens owning guns does not increase crime.

Which Wayne LaPierre echoes:

Wayne LaPierre, executive vice president of the National Rifle Association, said the fears of gun-control advocates -- that having more guns would lead to increased gun violence -- were unfounded.

"All the handgun bill people's predictions have proved to be wrong," Mr. LaPierre said.

Again.

Of course, gun control supporters will decry this as NRA extremism and dismiss the MPD's own reports and statistics as not being "credible sources". Yes, I'm serious. I have seen numerous individuals on such tolerant and open-minded laces like Democratic Underground dismiss out of hand statistics from the BATFE, FBI, CDC and so on as not being credible because an NRA article cited them in an article or press release somewhere but will quote cherry-picked, out-of-context statistics being misused or misrepresented by the VPC and Brady Campaign as "rock solid".

Weird. But I look forward to hearing the gun control people squawk that the MPD is a tool of the NRA.

Of course, for balance the Times also includes our local sad panda:

Peter Hamm, spokesman for the Brady Campaign to Prevent Gun Violence, said the District's new gun regulations are "sensible."

"We think the District has adopted sensible gun laws. If every jurisdiction in the U.S. had reasonable laws and common sense laws ... we would be fine with that sort of system," he said.

There's that word again: "reasonable". I've been hearing and reading that word a lot in the past year or so from folks like Peter Hamm in describing his vision of ideal gun laws. Reasonable to whom, Peter? I find this amusing that you now support the gun laws in DC as "reasonable" despite the fact that the Brady Campaign filed a brief in support of the then-existing DC gun ban.

From your own brief:

The Framers’ careful drafting of the Second Amendment to guarantee a limited right to be armed in service to organized state militias, while allowing the people’s elected representatives to take the action they deem necessary to protect the public from gun violence, should be respected and enforced.

Page 34

Emphasis mine.

So which is it, Peter? Was the DC gun ban "unreasonable" and the current laws "reasonable"? Or was the DC gun ban "reasonable" and the current laws "more reasonable"? I'm glad you're such a reasonable fellow with such flexibility in your reasoning and definitions!

You flat out stated that the Court's should defer to local laws and their definition of "reasonable". So whatever the locals thought were "reasonable" gun laws was a-ok in your opinion. But apparently that's not true because if a locality enacts gun laws they think are reasonable and work for their communities but seem too loose to you, then the laws are not "reasonable" by your definition.

They're "lax" or "virtually non-existent". Like Virginia's gun laws which the Brady Campaign decried routinely prior to the ban being struck down as one of the reasons why DC couldn't get a handle on its gun violence problem. Because their "lax" gun laws allowed guns to flow into criminal hands in the District.

Something I find interesting because in your same amicus brief, you highlighted Virginia's laws as a good thing:

Virginia’s restriction on multiple handgun purchases, for example, has sharply reduced Virginia’s relative contribution to the gun problem in the Northeast. These successes argue strongly for continuing to give legislators wide-ranging authority to protect their constituents from gun violence.

Pages 31-32

So were/are Virginia's laws reasonable or unreasonable? Or are they in some state in-between? On one hand you cite Virginia and give it poor grades on gun laws for its laxness but on the other hold it up in other areas as a model of "reasonableness" to be emulated?

Maybe DC should have changed their laws to be more like Virginia's since you did support Virginia in your brief.

I would point out that the DC laws have been changed several times since your "reasonable" ban was struck down due to the fact that DC Council actively worked to make it as difficult as possible for residents to own firearms and that resulting in several more lawsuits. The latest one being over the inability to own a specific model of gun because it was the wrong color as compared to the exact same model in a different color that was approved. Is that "reasonable"? That "reasonable" law comes from California, another place of "reasonable" gun laws you trumpet loudly as worthy of emulation.

So worthy, in fact, that DC had to change the law that mirrored California's very quickly to hopefully avoid losing a still-pending lawsuit and likely to avoid the side effect that such a loss would have also struck down California's legal handgun list containing this nonsense as well.

Was that action a reasonable response, Peter? How can California's gun laws be held up as a system of reasonable gun laws you're fine with when DC's current gun laws are in many ways looser than California's but are likewise reasonable? Which definition of "reasonable" are we supposed to accept and believe, Peter?

It's confusing.

But it is gratifying to see that the District of Columbia hasn't turned into some kind of Wild West with blood flowing in the street because handguns were suddenly legal for law-abiding people to own.

Oh wait...that was the District of Columbia while the handgun ban was in effect. The very same handgun ban you supported.

Way to go, Washington Times! Keep reporting on this terrifying story and let me know when the tidal waves of blood will begin sweeping towards Bethesda. In the meantime, I'll keep a lookout for Peter Hamm in the panda enclosure at the National Zoo.

Hey, sad pandas still need to eat!

Prison Farms, Carlin Style

I don't the source but this was posted on the Maryland Shooters forum:

SHERIFF JOE IS AT IT AGAIN!

Oh, there's MUCH more to know about Sheriff Joe!

Maricopa County was spending approx. $18 million dollars a year on stray
animals, like cats and dogs. Sheriff Joe offered to take the department over, and the County Supervisors said okay.

The animal shelters are now all staffed and operated by prisoners. They feed and care for the strays. Every animal in his care is taken out and walked twice daily. He now has prisoners who are experts in animal nutrition and behavior. They give great classes for anyone who'd like to adopt an animal.
He has literally taken stray dogs off the street, given them to the care of prisoners, and had them place in dog shows.

The best part? His budget for the entire department is now under $3 million.
Teresa and I adopted a Weimaraner from a Maricopa County shelter two years ago. He was neutered, and current on all shots, in great health, and even had a microchip inserted the day we got him. Cost us $78.

The prisoners get the benefit of about $0.28 an hour for working, but most would work for free, just to be out of their cells for the day. Most of his budget is for utilities, building maintenance, etc. He pays the prisoners out of the fees collected for adopted animals.

I have long wondered when the rest of the country would take a look at the way he runs the jail system, and copy some of his ideas. He has a huge farm, donated to the county years ago, where inmates can work, and they grow most of their own fresh vegetables and food, doing all the work and harvesting by hand.

He has a pretty good sized hog farm, which provides meat, and fertilizer. It fertilizes the Christmas tree nursery, where prisoners work, and you can buy a living Christmas tree for $6 - $8 for the Holidays, and plant it later. We have six trees in our yard from the Prison.

Yup, he was reelected last year with 83% of the vote.
Now he's in trouble with the ACLU again. He painted all his buses and vehicles with a mural, that has a special hotline phone number painted on it, where you can call and report suspected illegal aliens. Immigrations and Customs Enforcement wasn't doing enough in his eyes, so he had 40 deputies trained specifically for enforcing immigration laws, started up his hotline, and bought 4 new buses just for hauling folks back to the border He's kind of a 'Git-R Dun' kind of Sheriff.

TO THOSE OF YOU NOT FAMILIAR WITH JOE ARPAIO

HE IS THE MARICOPA ARIZONA COUNTY SHERIFF

AND HE KEEPS GETTING ELECTED OVER AND OVER THIS IS ONE OF THE REASONS WHY:

Sheriff Joe Arpaio (In Arizona ) who created the ' Tent City Jail':
He has jail meals down to 40 cents a serving and charges the inmates for them.

He stopped smoking and porno magazines in the jails. Took away their weights Cut off all but 'G' movies.

He started chain gangs so the inmates could do free work on county and city projects.

Then He Started Chain Gangs For Women So He Wouldn't Get Sued For Discrimination.

He took away cable TV Until he found out there was A Federal Court Order that Required Cable TV For Jails So He Hooked Up The Cable TV Again Only Let In The Disney Channel And The Weather Channel.

When asked why the weather channel He Replied, So They Will Know How Hot It's Gonna Be While They Are Working ON My Chain Gangs.

He Cut Off Coffee Since It Has Zero Nutritional Value.

When the inmates complained, he told them, 'This Isn't The Ritz/Carlton......If You Don't Like It, Don't Come Back.'


More On The Arizona Sheriff:

With Temperatures Being Even Hotter Than Usual In Phoenix (116 Degrees Just Set A New Record), the Associated Press Reports:
About 2,000 Inmates Living In A Barbed-Wire-Surrounded Tent Encampment At The Maricopa County Jail Have Been Given Permission To Strip Down To Their Government-Issued Pink Boxer Shorts.

On Wednesday, hundreds of men wearing boxers were either curled up on their bunk beds or chatted in the tents, which reached
138 Degrees Inside The Week Before.

Many Were Also Swathed In Wet, Pink Towels As Sweat Collected On Their Chests And Dripped Down To Their PINK SOCKS.

'It Feels Like We Are In A Furnace,' Said James Zanzot, An Inmate Who Has Lived In The TENTS for 1 year. 'It's Inhumane.'

Joe Arpaio, the tough-guy sheriff who created the tent city and long ago started making his prisoners wear pink, and eat bologna sandwiches, is not one bit sympathetic. He said Wednesday that he told all of the inmates:
'It's 120 Degrees In Iraq And Our Soldiers Are Living In Tents Too, And They Have To Wear Full Battle Gear, But They Didn't Commit Any Crimes, So Shut Your Mouths!'

Way To Go, Sheriff!

Like many of the posters on the forum, I am all in favor of the job Sheriff Joe is doing. If I lived in Arizona in Maricopa County, I'd vote for the guy.

"Disney Channel and the Weather Channel" - Priceless! At least the Weather Channel will provide useful information to the prisoners.

Given that I am in a bit of a mood today, I posted the following comment on the thread about what we thought was appropriate for prisoners:

I prefer George Carlin's technique of walling off square states, letting the prisoners loose and treat it as reality TV. If you're going away for life, you might as well have to earn every day of it among other like-minded individuals. Makes for educational TV too since you can use the "survival of the fittest" survivors that week as a lesson in Darwinism for schoolchildren.

Just air drop supplies in once a week or so and enjoy the fun. Has to be cheaper than building a Supermax to house a few hundred individuals. How much land can we buy for $50M, fence off and maintain lethal patrols around to prevent the condemned from escaping? I'd argue enough for tens of thousands.

Plenty of opportunities to hunt, fish, swim... what's not to like? Admittedly, the objects of those sports may not be animals but hey, that's a side effect. I'd argue Jeffrey Dahmer would have survived longer in such an environment and may have even thrived. Or not. But why not try?

Hollywood has done several movies involving "Lord of the Flies" type prison scenarios. I say it's time we did it for real and to hell with "touch feely" crap. If a prisoner can get a cable or satellite connection up and running and manage to keep it from all-comers, I say let him have it. But at least then he'll have earned it.

I'm a twisted individual. But I'm from Canada so you already knew that.

Offerings to the Gods

I'm hoping Neptune is starting to be satisfied.

This was a sailing weekend. I ran out to Annapolis to pick up some new sails. Well, new to me. There is a shop in Annapolis called Bacon Sails & Marine Supplies who is well-known in the local sailing community as the place to go to get used sails. Given that I've known about them going on 10 years now through word-of-mouth alone, that's telling.

It is a very dangerous place. In addition to sails, they sell new and used sailing hardware. Lots of ways to spend lots of money.

But I got what I wanted and came home with two new sails. A 111% genoa and a 50% jib I wanted for high wind conditions. The 111% is a nice, crunchy North Sail from a J22 and the 50% is solid and heavy. Bought the sails, avoided buying additional hardware and headed off for lunch.

Despite the fact that I hate Maryland, I do like certain portions of this hellhole. My home in Potomac being one and the city of Annapolis being the other. I might hate the place but I always enjoy wandering around Annapolis. Although a summer tourist trap I can still enjoy lunch on the City Dock and watch the boats. What's not to like?

Sunday I had to take the new sails out for a test drive. Since we were heading out with my friend Tom, his wife and their 18 month old son, I opted for the new 50% jib. It was a good decision. The forecast was calling for 5-10 knots out of the northwest but like any forecast, you have to learn the assumptions behind them. In wind forecasts, the unspoken assumption is that wind speeds can exceed forecast levels by 50-100% for short periods and gusts. So if they're calling for 10 knots expect some 20 knot gusts here and there.

For those who don't know why this is important, you have to understand that wind speed affects more than your speed under sail. It also affects how much force is being placed on your sails, and by extension, your rigging. The basic rule is for every doubling in wind speed, the force on the sails increases four-fold.

That means if I am experiencing a force of X pounds on the sails at 5 knots, the force will be 4X at 10 knots. At 20 knots, it will be 4X of that at 10 knots or 16 times greater from our 5 knot value.

For example, my O'Day 22 carries between 190 and 220 square feet of sail area depending on the cut of the sails. For argument's sake, let's assume 220 square feet. Here are the calculated wind forces for that sail area at various wind speeds (courtesy of Sailing USA):

• 5 knots = 23.71 pounds
• 10 knots = 94.82 pounds
• 15 knots = 213.34 pounds
• 20 knots = 379.82 pounds
• 25 knots = 592.63 pounds

Hence you can see why wind gust strength is important. What is manageable in one moment can become dangerous the next if you aren't ready for it. In boats like my O'Day, you start to look at smaller sails or shortening sail at about 15 knots. Otherwise, the forces exerted on the sails and the rig become a concern. Rigging is strong but the shock forces on a sail suddenly experiencing 4 times its normal load can make life very uncomfortable.

Above 10 knots, you may need a winch to help tighten the lines that control the sails (called "sheets"). Over 15 knots, it's a requirement. The smaller sail makes that load much more manageable.

Overall, my decision to fly the smaller jib was a good one. Yes, we moved more slowly but made nice progress north up river. That was a first. And the smaller sail area ensured the boat didn't heel over too much. We did see several boats heading upwind that were heeled over so far you could see their keel joints. There were several times that we were catching up to them. Some heel is good. Too much, as these boats had, is fun to sail if you're prepared for it but it robs you of a lot of speed and places excessive amounts of strain on your rig.

Gusty conditions are not the O'Day's forte. It's a daysailer, not a racer or cruiser. It is strictly a fair weather boat. The wind picked up a lot while we were out to the point an odd white cap could be seen here and there. Too much for me so we headed in. As we made the tack to begin heading back, I grabbed the jib sheet and in normal fashion, popped it up to free it from the winch drum. Alas, I forget that the winch handle was still in place and you can image what a loaded line did when it hit the handle from below.

It's amazing the stop-motion photography your brain catches as you watch a $50 winch handle and the only one you have pop free, glisten in the sunlight and in a sharp ballistic trajectory, sail gently over the side and disappear into the murky depths with a loud "Plop!" and a last twinkle of light off aluminum before the Deep claims it.

Much cursing followed.

I spent the rest of the sail downriver watching the water and easing out the sails as gusts approached. You learn to read the water and lots of little ripples surrounded by smoother water indicates wind. If those ripples are coming towards you, you are about to see an increase in wind. Ripples approach and the sails go out. Sure the sails will start flapping a little (called "luffing") but it keeps the wind forces down. You don't normally ease them out that far but because we had Tom's young son aboard, I was more interested in comfort for him than enjoying a boat heeled over suddenly to 25 degrees or more.

The only point of concern was when I turned up into the wind to start getting the sails down, the tip of my mast was shaking like a paint stirrer. I'm hoping that was just due to the vibration of the forestay with a flapping sail attached to it and the top of the mainsail whipping like a flag. Nothing to worry about I think.

However I'm still getting comfortable with the boat and feeling her out. This process takes time to learn what feels normal and what doesn't. I'm not interested in pushing any boundaries until I know the boat is shipshape top and bottom. I'm looking forward to getting her out of the water soon to get new bottom paint, get the mast down for inspection, fix some wiring, update the running rigging and generally make the boat "mine". She's in this limbo state with the old owner's name and setup but in my hands.

The on-land time will allow us to exorcise the last of the old owner's local demons and set up room for our own. Given at this point I've kissed two channel markers, broken a solar panel and now offered up a winch handle as an offering to the sea gods, I think it's about time. These are all minor issues in the grand scheme but when it comes to sailing you want to keep things that way. I'd rather buy off Poseidon with a winch handle and some champagne than hand him my entire rig.

For me. it's a good boat. But my wife has expressed concern with her "tippiness". Yes, she is that. At 22 feet and 2000 pounds, I'm not expecting rock solid sailing except in ideal conditions. 1-2 foot chop and the boat sways like a pendulum. Since all of her sailing has been done on heavy racers (read: America's Cup 12s) or ocean capable cruisers, this motion is not what she is used to.

So to my shock she has indicated she might be amenable to upgrading sooner rather than later. We might well only keep this boat a year or two and sell it off for a heavier 24-28 footer on the Chesapeake. Totally different cost equation and sailing experience though. I'd prefer it because my only complaint with the Potomac is the confined space. But the O'Day is a cheap boat to own, relatively speaking. So we'll see what happens.

But overall, I'd consider this most recent sail on the river to be the best we've had. Other than the winch handle offering, the boat sailed nicely, we all had a good time and go back into our slip without hitting anything. All in all I can't ask for anything more.

May Neptune be satisfied!

Sit in a Bedroom and Be an Asshole

Courtesy of Bruce comes a link to this blog post on CMT with John Mellencamp in which he describes his disdain for the current freedom of speech we enjoy. Go give Bruce's post a read as he captures the fecal gem that falls from Mellencamp's mouth.

I felt the need to reply on the original posting and I'm posting it here as well. Here it is my thought on the matter...

John Mellencamp doesn't "think people fought and gave their lives so that some guy can sit in his bedroom and be mean.". Furthermore, he describes freedom of speech as "Freedom of speech is really about assembly for us to collectively have an idea. We want to get our point of view out so we can assemble and I can appoint you to be the spokesman. That’s freedom of speech to be able to collectively speak for a sector of people. But somehow it’s turned into ‘I can be an asshole whenever I feel like, say whatever I like, be disrespectful to people and not be courteous.’ It’s not good for our society. Not being courteous is not really freedom of speech.".

You don't think people gave their lives to protect the freedom to say mean things, eh?

That's going to come as quite a shock to the Founding Fathers. You see, it seems they did the whole collective thing too. They had a collective idea. But it required them to say some really mean, and I do emphasize "mean", things about King George III. They accused him of all kinds of terrible things like levying horrible taxes, not listening to their numerous and collective attempts at sending spokesmen to discuss their grievances as a sector of people, about how they were unhappy with the idea of soldiers living in their houses and so on.

Finally, they had had enough of this, sat down and wrote a very long document called the "Declaration of Independence" that described in lengthy and very mean detail all the things that King George III had done and that they just weren't going to accept any more.

In this document, they wrote down their collective ideas while sitting in a small bedroom and, in eloquent 18th Century terms, did call King George III an "asshole" many times over. It was very disrespectful of the King. You don't say and talk about a King in that way. It was not gentlemanly or polite at all.

And when they were done, they signed it as a collective group and contrary to your belief, did fight and gave their lives to sit in that room and be mean by ending their discourteous rant against the King by stating "we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes and our sacred Honor.".

So what do you think? Was it appropriate or wasn't the Founders sacrifice enough for you?

By the way, the freedom of assembly is only ONE of the five items specifically covered by the 1st Amendment. Assembly is useless without the freedom to speak at the same time. There are many countries that will punish the mere attempt to assemble very seriously before one mean word ever leaves the mouths of the people attempting it.

So have a little respect for the asshole in the bedroom because you just might need him someday.

iPod Video and Ubuntu

This is a post for geeks. If you don't use "Ubuntu Linux" and an "iPod Touch/Video", don't continue. Your eyes will glaze over and the contents of this post will cause you to drool uncontrollably.

I'm throwing this up for future reference and to help fellow Linux users who may happen to own an iPod Touch or iPod Video and are having a devil of a time creating video that will play properly on it. Specifically under Ubuntu Linux.

It's no secret I'm a media junkie. Movies, specifically. I have slowly spent the past year or so ripping and encoding my DVD collection. When I started, I was using a Sony PSP as a music and video player. For DVD ripping, I use a program called dvd::rip. Works well and will rip 95% of the DVDs I've thrown at it. This can be installed from the Ubuntu package manager.

This program produces the basic AVI and MPEG movie files for computer playback and media server usage. To convert them for use on the PSP, I used a program called PSPVC. This has to be compiled and installed separate but it likewise works well. I used it to produce the MP4 files the PSP expects for video along with the movie thumbnails.

This setup served well for video up until I got an iPod Touch. Initially, I had few problems because I found the MP4 files produced by PSPVC were compatible with the iPod and played just fine. So I kept using the tools. Why change what was working? Alas, it seems sometime in the not-too-distant past Apple decided to change its iPod firmware and for no apparent reason, some MP4 files produced by PSPVC would no longer played on the iPod. I hadn't changed the formats but the iPod, for whatever reason, felt these were invalid video files. What was worse is there was no rhyme or reason for it. Two movies ripped the same day and only one would play.

This became very aggravating. So I began looking for a new encoding solution.

After working with various video tools on Linux for any length of time you'll quickly learn that most of them are front-ends to a program called ffmpeg. ffmpeg is the Swiss Army Knife of video converters. With sufficient codecs available for various video and audio formats and a proper knowledge of its myriad of command line switches, you can make this program convert any video from one format to another. Such is the utility of this program that there are pretty much no competitors to it. Video tools on Linux often simply put pretty front ends onto ffmpeg and invoke it on your behalf to save you from having to knows its arcane details.

This works very well when the defaults of your video tools produce the desired results. Both dvd::rip and PSPVC use ffmpeg for their video encoding. Where it becomes a problem is when the output you get doesn't work for you. That is the boat I found myself in a little while ago on Ubuntu Linux 8.0.4 LTS and my iPod Touch.

Since video is one of the primary uses of my iPod, frustration quickly mounted and I set out to figure out a way to get good video for my iPod under Ubuntu. Google quickly revealed numerous sites with detailed command lines to invoke ffmpeg to produce videos compatible with the iPod Touch. However, when I used these command lines they would either not run at all with bit rate or resolution errors or they would produce video with no audio.

I quickly found that Ubuntu for all its niceties occasionally leaves stuff out. The ffmpeg install on an up-to-date 8.0.4 LTS is decent but like any packaged software tends to be behind current releases. So many of the command lines that reference the iPod as a target output format don't work because the version installed on Ubuntu isn't new enough to recognize it. Past that, it seems that the out-of-the-box Ubuntu ffmpeg install can't handle the AAC audio codec for output properly.

These are my observations only but was the result of tinkering away with ffmpeg in a terminal window in a fruitless attempt to come up with a command line based on my reading to produce a good MP4 file for my iPod Touch. So I did what any good Linux user would do and decided to build a new version of ffmpeg and see if I could get it to work with iPod video.

I succeeded.

So, if you are an Ubuntu Linux user and have an iPod Touch or iPod Video, here's what to do to create compatible video for your movie watching enjoyment.

To create iPod video under Linux, you will need:

• The latest version of ffmpeg. Follow the instructions on the Download page to get the current version from the Subversion repository. You will likely need to run sudo apt-get install subversion before you can do this since Ubuntu desktop installs don't have Subversion installed by default.
• Current versions of the libfaac and libfaad audio codecs available here. This is important. Without both, the iPod video encoding won't produce audio.

Open a terminal window. You should be in your home directory. Run the following commands

sudo apt-get install subversion
svn checkout svn://svn.ffmpeg.org/ffmpeg/trunk ffmpeg

You'll get an ffmpeg directory in your home directory. This is where you will build your new ffmpeg from. But before you can, you need to install the audio codecs.

Unpack the faac-1.28.tar.gz and faad2-2.7.tar.gz archives you downloaded into your home directory. For me, I use Midnight Commander to open them and copy their contents to my home directory. Or you can use the archiving tool that Ubuntu provides. Once you've unpacked both, go into each directory and run the commands ./configure, make and sudo make install. That will install the latest and greatest versions of these libraries to your system. Overwriting the existing ones doesn't appear to hurt anything.

With the AAC libraries installed, you can now build ffmpeg. Go into the ffmpeg directory and run the following command:

./configure --enable-libfaac --enable-libfaad --enable-nonfree --enable-gpl

Once this command completes, run make. After a cup of coffee or a can of soda, you'll have a new version of ffmpeg sitting in this directory. Since I didn't want to upset my system, I installed the new binary/executable into the bin directory in my home directory. This directory allows you to override system programs with your own versions without having to overwrite them. Since I didn't want to upset Ubuntu with a version of ffmpeg installed outside of its package tree, this is the best option.

Copy the new ffmpeg to your bin directory with the command cp ffmpeg ~/bin.

Now when you run ffmpeg -version from the terminal, you should see something like:

FFmpeg version SVN-r19281, Copyright (c) 2000-2009 Fabrice Bellard, et al.
configuration: --enable-libfaac --enable-libfaad --enable-nonfree --enable-gpl
libavutil 50. 3. 0 / 50. 3. 0
libavcodec 52.32. 0 / 52.32. 0
libavformat 52.36. 0 / 52.36. 0
libavdevice 52. 2. 0 / 52. 2. 0
libswscale 0. 7. 1 / 0. 7. 1
built on Jun 27 2009 13:38:40, gcc: 4.2.4 (Ubuntu 4.2.4-1ubuntu3)
FFmpeg SVN-r19281
libavutil 50. 3. 0 / 50. 3. 0
libavcodec 52.32. 0 / 52.32. 0
libavformat 52.36. 0 / 52.36. 0
libavdevice 52. 2. 0 / 52. 2. 0
libswscale 0. 7. 1 / 0. 7. 1

This is good. It means your configuration and Subversion extracted copy of ffmpeg is in charge. This means you can now encode iPod video.

I prefer simplicity and for PSP compatibility, I've stuck with MPEG-4. The H.264 video codec is superior but takes longer to encode and produces larger files. Plus, my main complaint with most of the command lines out there is they throw every quality setting and option available out there on an iPod video. And then encode it at 640x400 or 640x480 resolution. This will produce video files almost as large as the original 720x480 rips from a standard definition DVD. The screen resolution of the iPod Touch is only 320x240. Lastly, most of these long command lines simply don't work. ffmpeg squawks constantly about bit rate settings being wrong and won't run.

So I punt. At 320x240, the bit rate will stay below the maximum permissible for the iPod Touch. So I produced a command line for ffmpeg that will produce a 320x240 MP4 video using the AAC audio codec. To produce a movie for your iPod Touch, run the following command line:

ffmpeg -i INPUT_FILE -vcodec mpeg4 -acodec libfaac -s 320x240 -f ipod -aspect 16:9 -vol 512 OUTPUT_FILE

Where INPUT_FILE is the name of the original video you want to encode and OUTPUT_FILE is the MP4 you want to produce. So an example command line might be:

ffmpeg -i TheGoonies.avi -vcodec mpeg4 -acodec libfaac -s 320x240 -f ipod -aspect 16:9 -vol 512 TheGoonies.mp4

Short, sweet and simple. And this should run fine and produce an MP4 version of your movie at about 1/3rd the size of the original input file. Use iTunes or whatever mechanism you are using to move your video onto your iPod and it should play fine.

The -vol 512 switch, by the way, is undocumented but increases the audio volume output. 256 is the default level so 512 roughly doubles the output volume. This is useful because the rips from dvd::rip tend to be quiet on the volume level. This helps even things out for iPod playback from its small speaker and headphones.

With this working, you can go one step further and encode an entire collection. For me, I dumped all of my AVI videos into a directory and wrote a little script to blow through them all to produce a iPod movie collection. To do the same, copy the files you want to convert into a single directory (no separate folders) and then save the following script to a file called convertToMP4.sh in your bin directory where you copied ffmpeg.

#!/bin/sh

for f in *.avi
do
name=${f%avi}mp4
echo -n "Converting $f to $name..."
ffmpeg -i $f -vcodec mpeg4 -acodec libfaac -s 320x240 -f ipod -aspect 16:9 -vol 512 $name
echo "done."
done

After you've saved it, run chmod +x ~/bin/convertToMP4.sh. Then go into the directory where your videos are and run convertToMP4.sh. The script will run and systematically convert every AVI file in the directory to an equivalent .mp4 file. If you are using an extension other than AVI, change tjhe 'avi' in the script above to whatever extension it happens to be.

I know it isn't sophisticated but it works. Once the script has run, you can copy the new .mp4 files to wherever you install them to your iPod from. In my case, an iPod directory on an external drive that I hook up to iTunes on a Windows laptop.

So there you have. Sorry for the length but I hope this will help other Linux users out there struggling to make their proprietary and onery Apple iPods useful and not have to use Windows-based tools to do it. Linux does video very well once you know how.

Happy ripping!

Forever ^ 5

Ok, it's been two weeks and Michael Jackson is still dead. State funerals don't get this level of coverage. Sadly, I can't make it stop because my wife would be mad if I put a bullet through our LCD TV.

My friend Tom sends me this from Yahoo: Resolution honoring Jackson faces GOP opposition.

Gist of article: The House wants to pass a resolution honoring Michael Jackson.

Question: Why is everything in the form of partisan debate? Despite the fact this garbage is sponsored by a Democrat, I am certain there are other Democrats out there rolling their eyes at this, not just Republicans and Independents.

Seriously, the government has solved at the big problems of the world so they can spend time on such insignificant and symbolic crap? Excellent! That means health care reform, violating the Constitution to craft a treaty with Russia, illegal immigration and a host of other problems have already been fixed. Hurrah! Now they can cut spending since they won't need the money anymore.

Rant commentary aside, it's fisking time!

First, the sponsor:

Jackson Lee, a Texas Democrat, took the stage Tuesday at the Staples Center in Los Angeles and hoisted a framed copy of the resolution, embossed with a gold seal. The measure will be debated on the House floor, she said.

I feel sorry for her as a child. Doubly so if she was actually named after Michael Jackson. There must have been an ass-whipping in there somewhere. I got more than my fair share as a child because I had an uncommon name for the time but at least my name is correct for my gender.

Continuing on...

Without mentioning King by name, Jackson Lee noted at the memorial that Michael Jackson was acquitted of child molestation charges. She blasted critics who "don't understand the hearts of entertainers" and "don't know how they heal the world on behalf of America."

Entertainers heal the world? Really?!? Then what do we have doctors for? Decoration? Why spend a dozen years and hundreds of thousands of dollars to become an MD when all one really needs to do is pick up a microphone and win American Idol? That's going to be a blow to a lot of medical practitioners out there since it appears they've all done it wrong.

Critics don't understand the hearts of entertainers? Is there something special and superhuman about entertainer hearts over regular people hearts that give them special powers? Must be since entertainers can heal the world on behalf of entire countries! That power must have a really short range though since things are still a shithole in Africa despite Madonna and Bono both tripping through several times. Maybe the people had to get really close for them to be healed.

Hmm, maybe Lee is on to something here with Michael Jackson?

I wonder though. If we're sending entertainers out into the world to heal it on behalf of America, that is going to come as quite a surprise to the US Navy. I don't recall seeing a flood of supplies being carried ashore on the backs of entertainers after the tsunami a few years ago or entertainers swooping in to drop supplies on Myanmar from the sky. We've wasted billions of dollars on carrier battle groups that can do things like this and it was entertainer's the whole time.

Amazing people, those entertainers.

Now for the math lesson...

Her legislation, House Resolution 600, lists several charitable acts by Michael Jackson over his long career and proclaims him as an American legend, musical icon and world humanitarian. He is, Jackson Lee said, "someone who will be honored forever and forever and forever and forever and forever."

Wow! How long is "forever to the fifth power"? Must be a really big number. I get lost after "infinity squared". Man, Michael Jackson dies and his honor will outlast the Universe. Who knew? Then again, he could heal the world so why not have his honor woven into the fabric of spacetime and travel beyond unreachable horizons?

If I were the Universe, I wouldn't be so keen on having Michael Jackson's "honor" woven inside me. Wouldn't that be an honor violation?

Poor Jackson Lee is running into problems though...

In the House, non-controversial resolutions honoring a person who has died or carried out a noteworthy accomplishment normally move quickly from committee to the House floor and then pass on a voice vote. The Michael Jackson resolution, introduced June 26, is awaiting action in the House Foreign Affairs Committee, of which Jackson Lee is a member and King is not.

An opponent could ask for a recorded vote, which then requires a two-thirds majority for passage. So far, Jackson Lee's resolution has just one co-sponsor, Rep. Diane Watson, D-Calif.

One co-sponsor. I guess Michael Jackson's healing powers didn't work domestically since she's only managed to get one other fool to sign on to this.

Then again, we're talking about the same body that passed a 1200+ page energy bill that wasn't even completed, no one had or could read and did it in a few days. Michael Jackson must be pissed off that his forever and forever and forever and forever and forever honor is taking so long. It took the House less than a week to fix "global warming", er "climate change", er "The Earth will kill us all!" but is into the second week of deliberating whether to do something as important as honoring Michael Jackson beyond the Heat Death of the Universe.

Well, it does take time to do important things. We wouldn't want to rush something as important as this, would we?

I think they should stick an amendment into this resolution forming a special guard to watch over Michael's grave though. They are going to bury him without his brain and that should be a concern for us. If he rises tomorrow, he'll be the head zombie and with no brain to kill, he'll be really hard to take down. Bullets won't stop it. We'll need to be ready for that. He could amass a legion of other dead celebrities and begin walking among us. Then again, how would they stand out against the living celebrities? They don't have functioning brains either.

When will this stop?

"Snickers Bar, Not Dark Chocolate"

I meant to post this last week but I figured I'd save it for a post-Fourth rant.

Here we have an article from CNN discussing the trend of single black women choosing to adopt children versus marrying and having them. If you've ever heard Chris Rock go off on how some relationships just can't work ("you're a black woman, he's a black man"), you'll understand where the basic point of this article is coming from.

The article even confirms Rock's premise:

"We're seeing more and more single African-American women who are not finding men," Caldwell says. "There's a lack of qualified black men to get into relationships with."

But I am stunned that CNN printed some of the other stuff in here and did so with apparent seriousness. Read on and be shocked.

Yet there are some single African-American women who are not emotionally ready to adopt an African-American child who is too dark, some adoption agency officials say.

Fair-skinned or biracial children stand a better chance of being adopted by single black women than darker-skinned children, some adoption officials say.

Not emotionally ready?!? Is that the new code word for "black racist"? Because that is exactly what it sounds like to me.

It gets better/worse. Very next sentence:

"They'll say, 'I want a baby to look like a Snickers bar, not dark chocolate,' " Caldwell, founder of Lifetime Adoption, says about some prospective parents.

Can you imagine the outcry if any white couple uttered such a thing if they were looking to adopt a non-white baby? You'd have demands for their heads on a pike next to very shrill cries of "Racism!" and so on. But when a non-white person makes such an utterance, its simply news and information for the reader. No controversy, no issue, no big deal.

It is a child not a bloody chocolate bar! I'm amazed they didn't also specify whether they wanted nuts under the wrapper or not.

But the sentence that follows this is the hands-down winner:

"I had a family who turned a baby down because it was too dark," she says. "They said the baby wouldn't look good in family photographs."

If any white person looking to adopt said this, there'd be a guillotine on their front lawn the following morning courtesy of Jesse Jackson with Al Sharpton under the black hood looking to take their head off. Complete with news crews and a crowd cheering them on.

"Wouldn't look good in family photographs"?!?

Words escape me.

I am floored that CNN published this. In any other context, this material would be worthy of a standalone hatred screed on Stormfront. And would fit right in among those white supremacists and their varieties of vile hatred.

But it is perfect OK for a black person to say such things and see them as perfectly acceptable. Simply recognizing the realities of the world as it were. These would be the same people, whom I suspect, would launch into a fit of apoplectic fury at the prospect of a non-black couple adopting a black child because such an act would be "denying them their black heritage" or "deprive them of important black cultural roots".

It is no less racism when it comes out of their mouths and it is way past time people started calling them out on it.

The subjects of these excerpts should be ashamed of themselves. It's hard enough to adopt any child and the fact that these people would pick and choose based on the color of an innocent child's skin as the factor that will determine whether that child is worthy of living with them is disgusting.

The only saving grace is that by their ignorance and xenophobia, those children will wind up in better, more loving and tolerant homes. But I despair for what the poor unfortunate child raised by such narrow-minded, intolerant, race-baiting dumbass individuals will be taught. In my opinion it would be no different than handing a baby over to a openly practicing, preaching member of the KKK.

Now I understand why so many children are in need of foster homes if this is the prevailing attitude among the available population of potential black foster or adoptive homes. "Too black, send'em back!". And pillory me for even suggesting that non-black couples are fine for fostering or adopting black children.

Weren't we supposedly to be over all this now that The One has ascended?

Just goes to prove that racism knows no bounds. Even down to the hatred of children who don't know any better. This affirms what my mother taught me is that racism is a learned behavior and it all starts with the parents.

Glad to see another generation of parents will be perpetuating it. All they need is a nice lawn and a burning cross to complement the landscaping. Except they'd be the one's putting them up and lighting the match.

Cross That One Off

I hope everyone had a good Fourth of July. I certainly did and I get to cross an item off my "To-Do" list. It took me almost 7 years but I finally got to see the Capitol fireworks display from the Potomac River. And it was quite a sight! The fifteen minutes of the very large Mall show plus a half-dozen or so smaller displays all the way down the opposite shore as far as we could see. It was a panorama of fireworks.

It was worth it. We spent most of the day just sitting at anchor just outside the marina. We had sailed for a bit previously but found it a little too rough for comfort. Still, I was glad we got some sailing in to let my friend Tom and his son experience a little of life under canvas.

I need to recharge the house battery. We ran it dry just after sunset. It might be too far gone to save since I don't know how old it is. If so, there's another $200 for a new house battery. I have some work to do when I get the boat hauled in a couple weeks. Hopefully, that should be the last of the lightening of my wallet for some time.

Back to work.